“I am the master of my fate; I am the captain of my soul” – W. Ernest Henley

Questions posed? “Are we able to make authentically free choices, or are our actions determined by factors beyond our control? Given exactly the same conditions or circumstances, could we have chosen otherwise than we did? Are we responsible for the choices we make and their outcomes, or should we be excused from responsibility?”

From the text book- The Philosopher’s Way, Fourth Edition, Author John Chaffee

I believe that most of our choices we make are based on our emotions. Our emotions drive us so strongly sometimes that we aren’t able to see rationally or logically. When we are faced with decisions and our emotions end up being the force behind the decision we have a shot at ruining our life, bettering our life or not creating much of a difference at all.

This is the reason behind the fact that I hate the following quote, “Follow your heart…”

Our hearts and what we feel with our emotions can lie to us. What is the driving force behind the strong emotion that is so powerful we can actually ruin our lives by following it? Well that is a matter of circumstance; and opinion. Are you excruciatingly lonely? When faced with the option to have sex with someone who you shouldn’t is probably going to over take your senses and you will make a choice you will probably regret. It is especially difficult to deny yourself this chance if you have had feelings for this person that you have been fighting for a while now. Say your best friend already told you that they like this person and plan to ask them on a date. Your friend finds out what happened, and now and forever there is a stain on the relationship between the two of you. If you relationship between the two lovers goes into something deeper then the innocent party could be offended by your choice in the matter.

But what is the right thing to do in this situation? No one will ever actually know for certain. What’s done is done and can’t be undone. I think that a person of high morals and integrity would answer, “You should not choose the option to have sex with the person that your friend likes.” When you make a choice that you know will more than likely end up hurting someone who trusts you, you can count on that trust flying out the window and watching it as it bounces off the pavement, struggling to come to a stop and then watch it as it is run over by passing cars until in vanishes into the weeds on the side of the road or until it is torn apart and disintegrated into nothing, smothered into the blacktop. Now, people can continue a relationship with the lack of complete trust but how happy and fulfilling is that relationship going to be? Probably not as good as it could have been. Now, this situation is different than people making mistakes and they didn’t know they were making them. A conscious decision to make the choice that you know could hurt someone is different than someone ~~~)  Remember that since you are friends you probably have a lot in common, therefore you are going to be interested in a lot of the same things.

What do you think would be more forgivable? Someone sleeping with the love of your life, or someone accepting a job offer that their friend has tried to attain for a year? Although I’m sure some would disagree, I think most people would say it would be harder to forgive the first one. Then there is another group who would say well both are pretty hard to forgive on the same level and insisting that a person who would do either one is not a good friend and cannot be trusted. For me I would be in the third group. I feel that anyone who would do either, doesn’t value me as a person who has feelings, let alone value my friendship.

Now, considering the question, would you make the same choice if you had the chance to do it all over again? Knowing then what you know now, would you make the same decision? As the saying goes, hindsight is 20/20. But then there are those of us who have analyzed this question with a certain situation in our lives and we honestly don’t know what we would do. Let’s say that you made a decision and you now have a child out of that decision with another person who is less than just desirable, but has made your life a living hell. A person who poses a threat to your safety and your hands are tied as far as eliminating the situation. If you could go back and change that decision, knowing what you know now, would you still have that child? If the situation meant that you or your child would not be in harms way or fearful every day because you would go back and change that decision? Would you, for the love of your child either decide against it or go ahead with it? Both of these answers can mean that you love your child and by choosing one or the other doesn’t mean that you love your child any less. For example it’s like someone giving their child up for adoption. On one hand, a person loves that child so much that they are willing to let someone (hopefully) more capable raise that child in hopes that the child will have a better life. And on the other hand you want to keep your child and love it and take care of it the best you can. Neither says that one loves their child more than the other. I personally could not give my child up for adoption but I don’t condemn those who do, for the right reasons.


*Exactly Where God Wants Us… ?

I have often thought for a long time now, that we are exactly where we are supposed to be in life. Exactly where God wants us. This has lead me to believe that we should live with no regrets, no looking back to the past and begin thinking the What if’s, and If only; and start analyzing pointless scenarios that cannot be changed anyhow, no matter how hard we think about it, it only leads to sorrow and the possibilities of   thinking I should have chosen that guy who was truly in love with me, or that girl who gave you her whole heart…. Or it gets us thinking that maybe we should have taken that job offer that would have moved you to the warm south that had a little less pay than the one you ended up taking which took you to cold and snowy New York (even though you hate cold winters). What if you would have saved yourself for the man or woman you were to marry, then you would have a special relationship with your spouse that cannot ever happen now, a bond that is sacred and can only happen when you choose to save yourself for that person you marry. What if you hadn’t had that abortion 25 years ago, the child you could have had, would now possibly be giving you grand children and written a book that helped millions of peoples’ lives. What if you had married your high school sweetheart and lived happily ever after with 2 children, a dog and a white picket fence.

Do you see the sorrow in thinking about the What if’s and if only’s?

Yet somehow there are times in my life, especially when looking at old pictures or reliving old memories, that I cannot help but wonder if my life would be somehow any better, or more exciting, or a little more comfortable financially, or would I have a better partner who gets me much more deep down to my soul than the person I’m with now. It begins to make me sad and depressed. I look at my beautiful children and think, if only I could keep my children and go back and do things differently. Ha ha! I begin to fathom the complete impossibilities and then laugh at myself for being so silly. 

I suppose all we can do is be grateful that there is a God above who can help us through our silly decisions and be thankful for what we do have and to stop thinking about what we could have had, because after all, if we had chosen different paths, life now may be even worse than what we currently have!!!

We can look through different glasses and still never know what God truly intended for us....

We can look through different glasses and still never know what God truly intended for us….

What do you think?

Do you think we are exactly where God wants us? Or are we simply here because these are the paths we chose and God is helping us make the best of where we are?

Living in a Jesus Bubble

imageSometimes, more often than not, I wish that I could live in what I call, a Jesus bubble, where I am protected from the outside world. Me and my children. Wouldn’t that be awesome! Completely safe from ever being attacked by satan or people who want to harm you? Don’t get me wrong, I trust that Jesus protects us even outside of a bubble, but He also at times allows the evil ones plans into our lives for many different reasons that we’ll never fully understand until we reach heaven. Therefore we still have to endure harsh times, either physical or mental or emotional issues, either with ourselves or with our loved ones… A Jesus bubble is one of my happy places I go to when I am in need of escape from the outside world…

Dealing with Boisterous Winds

Matthew 14:26-27

26 And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear.

27 But straightway Jesus spake unto them saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid.

28 And Peter answered him and said, Lord if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water.

What this means to me –>

Here we go again! Jesus is showing His raw power and the disciples are frightened instead of trusting and comforted by it. Still after all these years, we are like the disciples.

Can you imagine how shaken up their nerves must have been already, form the treacherous storm they were sailing through anyway? And then all of a sudden to see a figure in the distance basically floating towards them: I myself probably would have been frightened too, at first especially. And keep in mind this was before the Holy Spirit was given to them.

Jesus, knowing they were confused and frightened, called out to them, telling them don’t fret, be comforted, don’t be afraid, It is okay, It’s me, Jesus. Our souls and physical bodies are so weak that even thought they saw their Lord walking on water, Peter still says, prove it to me, If it’s really you let me come to you by walking on the water myself.

Even though Jesus gave Peter, the power to walk on water, and even after they saw Jesus walking on water, they still were not completely comforted, at lest not for very long anyway.

Time has a funny way of making us forget the power of our God. Making us almost numb to it in a way. But God, I believe, knows that every now and then we need a good reminder of His awesomeness and power, either through chastisement or blessings.

God is so good

In Christ’s love,


Trusting in Him

Matthew 14:29-31

29 And he said Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus.

30 But when he saw the wind, boisterous he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying Lord, save me.

31 And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?

What this means to me –>

I love how all throughout Jesus’ ministry, He is always asking people questions that He already knows the answers to, to get us thinking and to get us to realize our problems and that is always the first step to fixing any problem – realizing there is one and knowing what it is.

This is one of my favorite parts in the bible because it reminds us of how important it is (even possibly to the point of meaning life or death) to keep our eyes on Jesus. Even when all our senses get distracted by the boisterous winds that come along in our lives, and when all we see are the bad and scary things, we must remember to keep our eyes on Jesus, and also when we find ourselves caught up in life’s frightening moments, to cry out to Jesus! He will always be there to help us up!!

In Christ’s love,


Fear Worry Anxiety… Familiar to many of us

Ephesians 3:11-12

11 According to the eternal purpose which he purposed in Christ Jesus our Lord,

12 In whom we have boldness and access with confidence by the faith of Him.

What this means to me –> Since Jesus’ purpose is for our eternal security through Him, what left is there to fear? Through Christ Jesus we have boldness and access to the Father God. All we need is faith in Him to have all the boldness we need to get through this life.

All of this is much easier said than done, and I have had many issues and times when I let my fears and worries and anxieties get the best of me. But Jesus is a solid rock of foundation on which we believers build our lives and so when I get distracted by the adversaries tactics, Jesus always finds a way to get my attention and says, “Hey you, You are Mine and you can trust Me, when others let you down and when your faith starts to sink, I am here and will never let you go.” God is so good to us, we only need to be grateful for His sacrifice and trust Him with our lives and give Him our faith.

God has blessed us more than we can fathom and one day when we get to heaven, we’ll be able to understand.

In Christ’s love,